Have Goals? This One Trait Might Be the Key to Achieving Them
Plus, Three Ways to Increase It
All of my socials and more on Linktree!Key Points, Up Front:
Goals are important, but motivation fails
Success requires that we do hard things
Three ways to get better at hard things
In his book, Atomic Habits, James Clear encapsulates a bit of wisdom that still punches me in the gut when I read it:
“You do not rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your systems.”
Oof.
We all have goals. We base our whole lives on goals. Goals are what we look forward to the most in a lot of cases. They give life hope and add to its rhythm. Because of all that, we get invested in our goals. Some more than others, obviously, but they all consume a bit of energy to daydream about, plan for, etc. Even the low-level types, like “six pack abs by summer”—the ones we know aren’t getting done—even those take some effort to fret over.
And of course, the big goals take a great deal of investment, emotional, or otherwise: job promotions, fruitful marriages, impactful ministries, and so on. Some of these we hold so dear that we may wake up everyday—sometimes in the middle of the night—yearning for their arrival.
But let me ask you this: how many of your goals will be achieved by desire alone?
How much weight will you lose simply because you’ve identified it as a goal?
How many new sales will you close for your business?
How much more wholesome and loving will your marriage/relationships be?
The answer is zero. Goals count for nothing. All a goal is a desire to achieve something specific, but desire doesn’t count for much either. Not even fervent desire is all that useful when we get right down to it. Desire is only as good as the effort it stimulates because effort is the only thing that creates results.
…
Over the past four years, I’ve developed a pretty consistent routine of working out three times a week, at least. Overall, I think I might’ve missed five weeks out of 200+. You might think that I’ve become a “gym rat” or something—one of those people that just loooves being at the gym—but not so. I’m not terribly fond of the gym or working out—but I am very fond of the results.
That’s what gets me out of bed all of those times when I’d rather not. It’s not the goal of being healthier, stronger, more muscular, or whatever, it’s the system I’ve created to produce those results—and, believe it or not, that system has largely been built on one rule:
I workout every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, in the morning.
That’s it. That is the core structure. Over the years, I’ve added more terms and conditions, like waking up and going to bed earlier, drinking more water, and others, but the core has remained the same.
Where motivation fails, systems prevails. Instead of hoping to achieve the goal of physical wellness, I’ve come to rely on a set of routine behaviors that produce physical wellness.
Systems, routines, structure all help us to develop Grit—the trait that determines our resilience. Feelings will let us down a lot of if we’re not careful, especially when things get tough, so we develop grit to remove our dependency on feelings. It provides infrastructure for doing hard things.
…
How to Grow in Grit
1. Start Small, Work Your Way Up
Don’t sign-up for that triathlon, friend, at least not yet. Maybe start with a daily walking routine, or replacing some of your coffee/soda intake with water. The key is to define an activity—one that is a good means to an end—then set a time for it. Set an alarm for it as well. Create a recurring meeting invite for yourself— then do it, whether you’re in the mood or not.
Do not despise these small beginnings, for the LORD rejoices to see the work begin,
— Zechariah 4:10 (NLT)
2. Talk it Until You Feel it
We don’t realize how much our self-talk matters. What we say about ourselves, and everything else, has an effect on reality. If we allow ourselves to say “I don’t feel like going to the gym” then we don’t have much chance of feeling otherwise. Even if we don’t feel like going to the gym, we’ll have a much better chance of pulling it off if we work to convince ourselves that we do.
All of our actions are informed by decisions, and most of our decisions are influenced by which emotion is most powerful. Speaking life over ourselves at all times builds our ability to overcome fear, fatigue, etc. even at their peak.
Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits.
—Proverbs 18:21
3. Reframe Into Fun!
Once you are good at talking it, you can start getting good at believing it as well. What you’ll find is that it’s not all that hard to convince yourself of something, if you’re really committed to it. It all comes down to perspective—and we can get good at reframing our perspective; at changing our point of view.
This does have its limits, of course. You can’t convince yourself that filling for bankruptcy is a good thing per se, but you can convince yourself that a lot of good can come from it: lessons learned, a fresh start, more conviction for the future, etc.
Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.
— James 1:2-4
There are some in the world who catch lightning in a bottle—they buy the winning scratch-off, post the viral video—and boom, they’re a hit. The people we respect, though, are the ones that last, that are always productive, day after day, year after year. That requires consistency, and consistency requires grit.
Build your systems today so that you can start enjoying the fruits, instead of just dreaming about them—and be one of those consistent people that you admire.
Need help with developing your systems?
I’m opening up five more coaching spots. Five. That’s it.
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BONUS: Learn More About GRIT
Psychologist Angela Duckworth popularized the importance of grit through her research on perseverance. Her 2013 Ted Talk, and book with the same title, is a great primer on the topic.
Love this take on systems vs goals. The Mon/Wed/Fri structure is so simple but thats exactly why it works. I tried building habbits around "when I feel motivated" for way too long before realizing that relying on feelings just garantees inconsistency.